But You Have An Eating Disorder…

Maybe it is just my monkey mind working overtime, but I sometimes imagine that people hear I have an eating disorder and then automatically attribute that to my interest in health, nutrition, and food. Or vice versa. While that is a reasonable deduction, I don’t think it is quite that simple. First of all, my interest in these topics stems from a desire to regain a healthy balance back into my life.

Thinking too much about anything is not healthy, and food is no exception. However, I derive a lot of pleasure (both creatively and physically) from making dishes that nourish my body. In the same way, I am interested in seeking out the best foods to heal myself. I realize that food cannot fix my emotional issues, but I do believe it can be a tool to nourish and sustain me to be my best self. That is all that I wish to receive from food. While ED often does abuse the pleasure and necessity that is eating, I know that I do not feel my best when I am under his control. In fact, I hate it! That is how I know the difference: eating balanced, fresh foods makes my body and mind happy; abusing food does not.

What my health goals are

I’m not interested in fad diets or get-slim-quick claims, I am interested in lifelong health. Food is just one aspect of achieving that health. But it is still a very important one.  As I have commented before, depending on our choices, foods can have the power to energize us and to sustain us or to numb us and drag us down. I am striving to eat the former and to avoid the latter—or at least consume them in moderation.

Beyond eating

There is an excellent article titled “What Food is Not” that very eloquently states the role that food should have in our lives—and how expecting the wrong things from it can be very destructive (as I can attest to first-hand). I do not agree with everything in this post (specifically, the part about looking within ourselves for happiness. I believe happiness is not from us; it is from God.) Theological arguments aside, this is a fabulous read and I highly encourage you to head on over to Choosing Raw and check it out. Gena really hits home on this important topic.

An ongoing journey…

In conclusion, I just wanted to write this post to establish the fact that while I may suffer from food related issues, my interest in health and nutrition stems from a desire to recover from these issues and to thrive! I don’t claim to have all the answers—I’m just learning, after all!—but I do have a (pardon the pun) hunger to learn and I am greatly enjoying the journey. I think food is fun! It is a hobby, and although this hobby is distinct from my eating disorder it doesn’t mean that the two don’t cross paths sometimes. Usually, however, they intersect in the way that regaining confidence and and a sense of fun with food enables me to strive towards a normal relationship with it. Because, as I’ve  said it before—and I’ll say it again—eating disorders are not about the food.

Have a pleasant weekend, everyone!